Wondering where to find me for the next two weeks? Brazil! (Send your wedding wishes for Sarah and Júlio and I will pass them along.) I’ve been pumping the bossa nova etc. in preparation, but nothing is quite so heavy on the rotation as If You Will, the new album from the queen of Brazilian jazz, Flora Purim. This is her first studio album in 15 years — just a blink in her more-than-six-decade career — and it’s a bit of a victory lap, reinterpreting some older tunes and reviving collaborations with greats like Chick Corea and George Duke. My fave, “This is Me,” spiffs up a 2005 release with vocals by Flora’s daughter, Diana.

“I’ve always been the kind of girl that hid my face, so afraid to tell the world what I’ve got to say,” she sings.“Gonna let the light shine on me, now I’ve found who I am, there’s no way to hold it in. No more hiding who I wanna be, this is me.”

Devastatingly lovely lyrics to hear through the mouth of the progeny, right? Flora has worked her stuff out and here she is at 79, handing down her hard-fought sense of self. Lap it up and pass it on.

Are we all ready for a trend piece on sex parties? How about if it’s written by someone who has clearly never been to one? Salon interviewed three sex party producers about an influx of interest in the time of Covid, and in case you’re wondering about the author’s comfort level with the subject matter, she writes: “I was directed to these producers by respected academic researchers in sexuality. To me, all three producers seemed to be good people in a business that, over the past two years, has been tremendously difficult.” (They do deal in sex but trust me, they’re ok 🚩🚩🚩.)

Before she gets to actually interviewing any of them, though, she tells us why weird sex is on the rise: Surveys say hOW MuCH S3x pEOplE W4nT (“oodles!”), and experts tell us, “With pandemic boredom and stress, people may need more intense stimulation to amp up desire. Also, all the deaths have made it clear to everyone that time is limited.”

Not that we can’t report on communities outside our own, but I’m not sure I want our big intro to sex parties to read like an ethnography. By contrast, see my friend Mike Rosen‘s piece on his first experience attending one:

“More than anything there’s conversation, laughter, a sort of communal dropping of the shoulders. It’s all just so casual, and almost entirely sober… These are the people I want to be associated with: people who live without shame. I have gone most of my life craving a freedom like theirs. I love it. I love how joyful they are to be seen as they are regardless of who’s watching. I love their willingness to celebrate a part of themselves that all of us have, but so few of us actually recognize.”

One of these pieces knows “sex” the word. The other knows sex the entity, and how deeply it nestles, whether we see it or not, into every part of our lives. (One of these authors is a psychologist, guess who.)

The rest of Mike’s piece I shall not spoil, but I will say that there’s an unexpected and deeply healing experience in there. Do yourself a favor and give it a read.

Anyone in need of a vanilla-flavored palate cleanser right now might enjoy this Wall Street Journal update on the rise of King mattress sales, specifically among spouses who want more space in between them at night. Boring? Boring.

How do you make a bed less boring? Toyyyyyyys. Hello Cake has you covered in that department with everything from lubes to rings and cleverly vibrating items. Keep them at home, carry them onto the sex swing, follow your heart. Click here to shop and get 15% off with the code LOREMIPSUM 😘