This song takes a second to gather itself together, as we all do when we hit the phase in question. “Adulthood” opens with some full-hand, kid-style piano banging, which sorts itself into a beat over about 20 seconds, allowing for a banjo and some drums to join. Then the vocals hit: “Welcome to adulthood. You picked a special time to be alive.” That special time is seemingly interminable: the six-minute track indie-folk-rocks you through a bunch of grown-up lyrics and feelings that are mostly carried along by that sweet, plodding beat and eventually descend into a kind of joyous chaos. It’s not the worst conclusion to come to on the concept of adulthood, and if you’re into it, you’re in luck: Very Good’s new album drops this Saturday.
Perhaps for utility or just for fun, you’ve spent time swiping through a baby-naming app, trashing “Kyler” and delighting in the discovery of “Ajax” and “Tamari.” The apps are great for inspiration and everything — truly, how are there this many names — but they nonetheless pose a problem: they leave you with agency. For those of us too busy or simply too confused to name our own children, enter: Future Perfect, a service that will come up with a shortlist of names for you based on a quick interview. Started by two name-focused moms in Chicago (their kids are Eyan, Jude, Reeve, and Vaughan, take it or leave it), the service is a classic example of making a business out of your pleasure— they loved spending their time this way and now they can do it for others and charge. But check with your friends before you give this as a baby shower gift, as the site suggests. Some people enjoy naming their own kids; the founders should know.
The other day in Park Slope I overheard a mother earnestly relaying a woman’s credentials to a friend, stressing that she’d worked at “Boober.” New mothers in the house, maybe you’re up on it, but I had to google, and, ta-dah, Boober is an on-demand lactation consultancy (with a target-shaped logo to keep our focus). A+ for not just thinking of the name but actually going through with it. And now that they have, they’re faced with a conundrum: the boob-centric portion of the business has gone so well, they’re expanding into doula care, pelvic floor therapy, mental health, acupuncture and more. What do you do when you’ve outgrown your name? Better call in Future Perfect. Or Mailchimp.
A Jia Tolentino piece on why we treat our dogs like humans.
